Pain has no gain
by jake brayn kenko
Summary: As I sit, rocking back and forth. The skies drawn closer to me. I sighed, I felt a peace.   Death and a horrible past. Kogan and jarlos


_Dark gray clouds hung over head, rain fell from the skies and on to the large town. People ran down the sidewalk toward their homes, cars racing to and fro. Kids yelling in joy at the puddles that formed in the pot holes. Mothers calling their children(s) in so they can get out of the rain. But one guy didn't care, his brown hair stuck to his face and skull. His chocolate eyes glazed over with pain at the realization of what his lover had done. A troubled sigh slid out of his perfect lips. "Why?" he whispered to himself._

_His small strides turned into a brisk walk as he thought of just going home and taking a shower. Hurrying, the upset teen grabbed his key out of the side of pocket in his black drenched coat. Unlocking the door and stepping inside, sighing, he slid his hood off his head. Looking up, the teen took of his shoes and peeled off his jacket. Taking a step on the white carpet and into the arms of his lover. Wrapping an arm around the smaller male's shoulders. "Welcome home James" so said male._

_James smiled lightly and tightened his hold. "Thanks Logan" he answered back._

_Logan smiled against James' chest before pulling back and staring at him in the eyes. "How was work?" he asked._

_James shrugged his shoulders "Fine I guess"._

_The smaller teen turned and walked over to the kitchen with a smile lined on his lips. James followed behind him. "Um.. Logan?" he started._

_ Logan lifted his eyebrows while turning, staring at him with innocent eyes. "Yes?"_

_James started then stopped, the larger teen hesitated. "Kendall said he saw you with someone else at the beach today.. I was wondering who?" I asked cautiously._

_Logan stiffen slightly before answering slyly "With a friend" he smiled again._

_James smiled back "Good to know" as he said that. He walked over and kissed his lover on the forehead and walked up the steps. "Goodnight Logie" he called over his shoulder._

_Logan watched him "Good night Jamie!" he called back. Turning around, tears slid down his face "What am I going to do?" he sobbed quietly to himself. Sitting down on the chair while staring at the table top. More tears fell down his face as he thought of James then his 'friend'. _

_Morning..._

_ When James woke up, Logan laid near him. His smaller form looked peaceful, James leaned over and kissed his boyfriend on the cheek. "Morning love" he whispered huskily in his ear._

_Logan groaned out, tired. "Mornin" he answered groggily back._

_James smiled against his temple as he slid out of bed and walked over to Logan's side. Moving on top of him, kissing his lips. "It's been a while" he whispered. Kissing down his jaw then his neck. Logan moaned into the touches, moving his head for James to kiss further. "C-Carlos" he moaned out._

_James stopped what he was doing, pulling his lips away from Logan's neck. "What?" he asked._

_Logan's eyes wide in fear as he stared at the wall, tears falling down his cheeks. "James.." he answered with a crack in his voice._

_The teen stood up from the bed, glaring down at his lover. "Say the name again" he ordered._

_ Logan looked up from the bed "I said JAMES!" he screamed out. More tears fell from his face._

_James backed up "You said Carlos" he said in disbelieve._

_Logan shook his head "N-no I said J-James" he stammered._

_James shook his head as his own tears fell "You need to get your names right!" he bellowed out. Racing out the door, grabbing his phone and running out the door. Slamming it shut, walking briskly over to his silver Mercedes. James jumped in, started the car and left his house. Calling his friend.. Kendall._

_~Back at James' place~ _

_ Logan laid in the bed, curled in a tight ball. Tears falling down his face from what had happened. Screaming out in pain when he felt his heart stop beating then restarting once more. A choking scream echoed about in the Maslow house. Logan laid in the bed, his body shook as he sobbed to himself, grabbing his phone and calling up Carlos. _

"_Hello?" A groggy voice answered the phone._

"_C-Carlos?" he asked._

"_No this is Kendall" Logan dropped his phone. _

"_No.. No" Grabbing his knees and pulling them to his chest. Rocking back and forth._

"_Hello?.. Hello?" Kendall asked over and over. Shrugging his shoulders, Kendall shut the phone. _

_ The smaller teen sobbed in the quiet home, gripping his chest where his heart slowly beated in his chest. More screams and howls of pain echoed in the house till everything ebbed away into complete silence. The rain started again, pattering against the roof of the house. _

_Logan laid in the bed, silent and unmoving. So much grief and pain made his heart stop. _

_~Carlos~ _

_ The Latino teen stepped up to the doormat, ringing the door bell. He needed to his friend. The teen pounded on the door, harder and harder each pound. "LOGAN!" he bellowed out. Worried, the teen busted the door down and raced up the steps. The carmel skinned teen ran in the room, finding Logan on the bed. Dead.. Almost... Jumping forward, throwing his smaller body to where it laid on his back. Leaning his head down to hear his heart not beating. Howling out, the teen started CPR. Calling 911 after he started his friends heart once more. As the friend was on the phone, Logan's heart stopped again. The Latino threw the phone while screeched "HELP!" starting CPR once more. _

_The paramedics came in a hurry, taking away the body. The friend went along with him, holding his hand and praying._

_~James~_

_ James paced back and forth with Kendall sitting on the couch. "I don't know why he would do this with me!" he hissed at himself._

_Kendall sighed, having someone wake you up at 3:00 am is kinda bad. "James please…" he pleaded._

_As he was about to say more his phone vibrated in his pocket "Hello" he answered it._

"_WHAT!" Kendall shot up from the couch and started for the front door._

"_JAMES AND I WILL BE THERE!" he bellowed out into the phone._

_Slamming it shut. "Logan's in the hospital!" he said in a panic._

_James' heart stopped, his anger and hatred forgotten as he thought of his love._

_Kendall ran over, grabbing his hand and racing out of the house. Forgetting to lock it._

_As they traveled over to the hospital, Carlos' dad ****who****is****a****cop**** had escorted the boys over quickly. James was sitting on the passengers side, his irregular breathing cut short as he thought. 'I did this to my logie' he thought to himself._

_Kendall, scensing the sudden gloom and dead aura, reached over. Clasping his hand tightly on his shoulders. "He'll be alright James" he reassured his friend even if he didn't believe it himself._

_James looked away, out the window. His face held tight from the pain, grief and disbelief. _

_When they entered the Hospital, James had already raced off to go and see Logan. Carlos was left with the questioning Kendall and his father, Logan laid weakly in the bed. Tears strolling down his face, he wanted to die. If he can't have James he wants to die. Never breath unless it's James'._

_As the hurting boy laid in the gurne, a broken look casted on his eyes. He felt weak and vulnerable. As stupid he may be, he knows love and pain. He knows the conceqences of loving another but he wants to be with James more then anything at all. Logan felt alone and hurt, his heart swelled with agony at the thought of James. _

_Logan had been so caught up in his thoughts of his lover, he didn't notice the door opened. As he looked at the bed with a broken look, James frowned. "Logie?" he whispered. _

_Logan lifted his head at the sound of his lover's voice. Black eyes held it's own suffering. "James?" he asked hoarsely._

_James let a light smile on his lips as Logan's eyes had a very small fire. "Yes it's me Logie Bear" he whispered softly._

_The taller male slowly walked over to his love, brown mixed eyes looked into black. "I'm sorry" Logan whispered in so much pain._

_Tears streamed down his face, James cupped his Logan's face and let the stray tears be wiped away by his thumb. "It's okay Logan. As long as I have you" he whispered. _

_Black eyes widen at those words, few and simple but so much meaning. "you still want me after what I did too you?" he asked. Leaning forward._

_James smiled wider. "Yes of course, you are the only one that makes the sun warm. You are my only breath, if you leave then I will not be able to breath." James confessed. "When winter comes, you are there to warm my cold and aching body with your love and compassion" he leaned in further. "Without my moon has no rays. The starts will not sparkle without those beautiful black eyes" he continued, leaning further till their lips brush. "If I lose you to anyone, even death it's self, I will follow you no matter where I end up. You can be in heaven and I can be in Hell but I will not allow that to separate us again. I will kill anyone who tries" he mummeres before crushing their lips together._

_Logan felt at peace, if he died right now; in James arms, he would be happy. As they kissed, it got a bit heated so Logan pulled back. "James.." he whispered. "You are my breath, my sun and moon, the water that crashes upon the shore. The light that comes from anywhere. You are my everything, and always will be" Logan pushed his fingers in James' hair. "You are my angel of death and if I had to die, I would want to die from those hands of yours. I could not and would not die until I have you near me" he whispered. "I will never be able to be happy unless you are with me, if I am miles away. I will and forever will, love you till death" As they finished, they smashed each other's lips together again._

_After everything was back to normal, Logan and Carlos grew close as brothers and James didn't mind it but he made sure to show Logan is his. Kendall had asked Carlos to marry him. Logan had lived a long and full life, but everything good comes to an end. _

As I sat in the old rocking chair my husband of 56 years had built with his hands. I stare into the sunlight off the pourch, a light and soft smile lined my wrinkled lips. I am old and very frail but my love has never left me alone. He is still with me, always. In heart, mind, body and soul. He might have passed on but his love still is here with me.

The sunlight had awoken me, lifting my head from my slight slumber. "damnit I had fallen asleep again" I complained. Standing on weary and weak legs, I turned slowly and walked into the house. His pictures over the years, always would stay up. Smiling brighter, I climbed the stairs and entered our room. It is 8:20 P.M.

'_Time__for__bed_' I thought and laid down. I am still wearing his clothes no matter what. As I look over at the picture frame of us too on our last honey moon before he died. We were in each other's arms, both smiling. His brown mixed eyes held so much love, compassion and passion it made me cry everynight. A tear slid down my face. Sighing, I laid back and turned off the light. Grabbing the photo and holding it near my chest. "I will be with you forever and always" I whispered and sighed once more.

Logan and James have passed on, they lay near each other in the same graveyard. Both have their photos of each honey moon or fun trip they did together and between them sat a picture of the two, smiling at each other. The last picknick they had together before passing on. It was sunny with barely any clouds in the photo and the two are laying down, talking about their love. But now they are together at last, Logan had to wait for 4 more years then finely passed on to be with his James.

_~Thee End~ _


End file.
